You may have been told that college will be the best years of your life. Or maybe that your 20s are supposed to be the best years of your life. Maybe it’s because you’re traveling more, dating, moving away from home, or experiencing new milestones for the first time. While these can all be exciting experiences, they don’t automatically make this period of your life the happiest or most fulfilling. Your life may not look like the picture you’ve been sold, and that’s okay. Your life does not have to look exciting to others to be fulfilling to you.
Where Does This Pressure Come From?
The expectation that you should be living the “best years of your life” can create more pressure than motivation. Social media isn’t inherently bad, but it has made it easier for people to document and curate every second of their lives. As a result, it can become difficult to separate what is genuine from what is specifically presented online.
While you’re scrolling through TikTok or Instagram, you’re only seeing short clips and highlight reels of someone’s life, not the everyday moments in between. Over time, this can create a parasocial relationship with people you don’t actually know and encourage unhealthy comparisons. It’s easy to look at an influencer’s vacation, friend group, or career and feel like you’re falling behind, when in reality, you’re comparing your everyday life to someone else’s precisely curated highlights.
The Psychology of FOMO
FOMO, or the fear of missing out, is often associated with missing a party or finding out your friends got together without you. However, it can extend far beyond that. Many people experience FOMO over missed opportunities, life experiences, relationships, careers, or even the version of life they think they should be living.
These fears can build upon one another, creating unnecessary anxiety and dissatisfaction, especially for individuals already struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health conditions. While you’re wishing your life looked different, you may miss the opportunity to appreciate everything you already have.
There is Nothing Wrong With Living a Quiet Life
When people think of a ‘quiet life,’ they often imagine a slow, uneventful lifestyle filled with knitting and crossword puzzles. While that may be someone’s dream, a quiet life looks different for everyone. Everyone has unique values, priorities, and goals that shape how they choose to spend their time.
A quiet life doesn’t necessarily mean an isolated or boring one. It can look like living in a small coastal town, enjoying a consistent routine in a busy city, spending weekends with close friends, or simply finding joy in everyday moments. A peaceful and simple life can still be full, meaningful, and exciting in its own way.
How To Define Your Own Best Years
Technology Detox
As much as people say it, there is some truth to the idea that spending less time on your phone can benefit your mental health. Limiting your screen time and social media use can reduce the number of opportunities you have to compare yourself to others. Whether it’s setting time limits on certain apps, temporarily offloading social media during periods of high stress, or deleting an app altogether, creating distance from constant comparison can improve your emotional well-being.
Romanticize Your Own Life
Stop waiting for one big accomplishment or milestone to define your happiness. Instead, start appreciating the moments you already have. Pick up the book collecting dust on your nightstand and read outside. Go on a sunset walk around your neighborhood. Revisit hobbies you loved as a child, like dance classes, painting, or crafting with friends. Explore a new coffee shop, visit a local park, or create playlists that make everyday moments feel special. A fulfilling life is often built through small, intentional moments rather than extraordinary ones.
Be Intentional With Free Time
Working a 9-to-5, balancing school, or managing family responsibilities can be emotionally exhausting, but what you choose to do with your free time can have a significant impact on your overall well-being. Set aside time for the things that genuinely matter to you, even if it’s just ten minutes a day or an hour each week. Whether you want to travel more, start a business, attend more concerts, explore your city, spend more time outdoors, or simply save for a future goal, intentionally making space for those priorities can make life feel more meaningful.
It’s not always easy to prioritize your mental health while balancing work, school, family, friends, physical health, and everyday responsibilities. Finding small ways to incorporate joy into your routine can make a big difference. Try “habit stacking” by smiling during your daily walk, putting your phone away during your commute, practicing affirmations while getting ready in the morning, or taking a few minutes each day to slow down and be present. Your best years aren’t determined by your age; they’re created through the life you intentionally build for yourself.
THERAPY SERVICES WE OFFER IN MANHATTAN & BROOKLYN, NEW YORK
The “best years” of your life aren’t determined by your age, where you live, or how exciting your life looks on social media. Maybe your best years are the ones you intentionally create by letting go of comparison and appreciating the life you’re already living. A meaningful life doesn’t have to look exciting to everyone else; it just has to feel fulfilling to you.
At Manhattan Wellness, we understand how this pressure can impact your mental health. We want you to learn the techniques that benefit your daily quality of life. Through our safe space for growth and rejuvenation, you can be your best self. We believe you have the power to make the changes to better your mental health, and we are here to help. Take control of your life and make a difference.
- Submit a Contact Form or Email Us at hello@manhattanwellness.org
- Learn More About Our Team of Therapists for College Students and Our Therapy Specialists
- Let’s Talk About How We Can Help You Feel Empowered & Ready To Take The Next Step!
SPECIFIC THERAPY SERVICE WE OFFER IN MANHATTAN & ONLINE THROUGHOUT NEW YORK, NEW JERSEY, AND FLORIDA
At Manhattan Wellness, our therapists are here to support you in navigating this journey and finding the excitement in your life. This is why we offer a variety of services to ensure you get the support, care, and guidance necessary. The therapy services we offer are Depression Therapy, Anxiety Therapy, therapy for college students, and more. Are you feeling as if you are not living the life you deserve? Let’s talk about it.
