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mw editorial

are you falling for someone’s potential or reality?

October 13, 2021

It can be difficult to maintain an open mind while dating someone new. This is a common mistake we often make when we meet people. We all tend to imagine how they could be better, but fail to embrace the reality of who they currently are.

Don’t get me wrong: there can absolutely be someone out there for everyone and it’s important to see potential in every relationship you pursue. However, it will only weigh your current situation down if you’re not seeing things clearly from the start.

Every relationship is unique, but there are some general rules that can help guide you in your pursuit of love:

Allow people to be who they are and don’t try to change them.

A woman and a man sitting across from each other in a counseling session in Manhattan. Counseling myths can be busted.

Some people are working on themselves, but that doesn’t mean they’re ready or willing to share everything with someone at the beginning stages of a relationship.

It’s important to allow people time and space for personal growth if it truly matters to them. Don’t take their efforts in your relationship for granted, but also don’t force them to grow before they’re ready.

Don’t box yourself into a mold either.

It’s also important to be mindful of how you present yourself in your relationships. We all have an ideal version of ourselves we would like to be and it can be difficult to let go of this fantasy when someone is interested in us.

It’s important to be true to yourself and remember that you don’t have a certain type. People may not fit the ideal mold of the person you imagined yourself with, but that doesn’t mean they’re not right for you.

However, stay true to your personal values and never compromise them for someone else.

An Asian woman sitting on the ground looking down upset at her phone. Representing someone who could use support from an anxiety therapist in Manhattan, New York. She can start feeling better and stop having panic attacks with anxiety therapy or treatment for social anxiety.

It can be easy to lose yourself in the beginning stages of a new relationship, but you should never feel forced into changing for someone else. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but it can be helpful to step back and take things slowly.

Be mindful of how the person actually shows up in the relationship by observing their behavior.

If you’re falling for someone based on their potential alone, then chances are they won’t live up to your expectations when reality unfolds in front of you.

The bottom line is that you need to be aware of how the person shows up in your relationship and compare this reality with what they’ve said or promised.

If there are discrepancies between these two, then it’s time to reevaluate whether or not this person will actually make a good partner for you. It can sometimes take some time to see these incongruencies, but it’s important to be aware of them from the start.

Final Thoughts

It’s important to be honest with yourself when you’re looking for love. This means asking yourself if you’re truly able to accept the person for who they are, and not what potential future you imagine for them.

It’s important to follow your heart and intuition and remember: love is rarely a smooth ride, but it brings with it some of the greatest joys we experience as humans

THERAPY SERVICES FOR DATING AND RELATIONSHIPS WE OFFER IN MANHATTAN & BROOKLYN, NEW YORK

If the journey of being a happy, single person feels challenging, seeking professional support can be a valuable resource. Therapists are trained to help individuals navigate their emotions, explore personal goals, and develop strategies for finding fulfillment. Through therapy, you can gain insights into patterns of thinking and behavior, identify areas for growth and receive guidance on building a positive and meaningful life.

Our society often prioritizes romantic relationships, but learning how to be happy as a single person is a powerful and transformative journey. It’s a time for self-reflection, personal growth and the cultivation of genuine happiness that comes from within. By embracing solitude, practicing self-love, building meaningful connections and setting personal goals, you can navigate the single life with confidence. Remember that being single is not a state of lack but an opportunity for fulfillment. Embrace your journey, focus on your well-being and fall in love with yourself!

  1. Submit a Contact Form or Email Us at hello@manhattanwellness.org
  2. Learn More About Our Team of Female Therapists and Our Areas of Expertise
  3. Let’s Talk About How We Can Help You Feel Empowered & Ready To Take The Next Step. 

OTHER THERAPY SERVICES OFFERED IN MANHATTAN, BROOKLYN, & THROUGHOUT NEW YORK

We offer a diverse range of individual counseling services and couples therapy. Our dedicated therapists can help with stress management, symptoms of depression, self-esteem challenges, and college student counseling. Additionally, we specialize in offering support for addressing body image concerns, and navigating the unique challenges faced by women, among other aspects. If you need support, reach out to connect with a therapist.

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