stop attracting the wrong kind of partner

If you find yourself in a constant cycle of dating, committing, fighting and breaking up, you may be in the habit of attracting the wrong kind of partner. It’s time to stop, refocus and change your ways, so that you can start attracting the kind of person that’s healthy for you. Below are some steps to take, before you enter the dating pool, to help you re-center and consciously choose a person you can be happy with.

Get To Know Your Authentic Self

Take some time to think about what’s important to you. Get out a sheet of paper and make a list. What are your core values? Consider all aspects of your life, family, career, health, and relationships. Identifying your core values will allow you to start living in a way that honors your goals and dreams. Identify any limiting beliefs about yourself by writing down any old thoughts that you tell yourself. I’m not pretty. I need everyone to like me, etc. By identifying these patterns, you can release them and start telling yourself the opposite. You are pretty and you do deserve love   Get rid of anything that is coming between you and these principles. 

Assess Your Needs In A Relationship

Everyone has things they need from a relationship, so don’t tell yourself that needing something is not okay. It’s perfectly normal. You may have needs for affection, commitment and open communication. Make a list. Think about a previous partners where your needs were not met and how that felt. Becoming aware of what you require for happiness will help you keep these ideas in the forefront while dating. You’ll be able to recognize quicker when something isn’t meeting those needs and must change or go.

Identify Old Attraction Patterns

Do you always fall for the bad boy? Maybe you always end up with a person who’s beautiful on the outside, but not very nice on the inside. Or maybe you married your best friend who was really nice, but there was no physical spark. Figure out what your old attraction patterns have been, so that you can be aware of them. It’s not always something you have to avoid completely. For instance, if you like bad boys (or bad women) maybe it would be good to have elements of danger in a relationship, like a motorcycle. Watch out for unhealthy danger, like abuse or addictive behavior. By being aware of your old patterns, you can consciously choose someone who’s good for you, instead of falling back into unhealthy dynamics.

Don’t Settle

Now that you know your values and what you need, stop settling for anything that doesn’t meet these requirements. You’re only wasting your time and making yourself miserable by settling for something that doesn’t work for you. Stop telling yourself that you can’t find a partner that fits your standards. They’re out there, you just have to know how to express what you need and be willing to walk away if it doesn’t work.

After you’ve fully considered each of the points above, make a plan about how you want to proceed and stick with it. If you find yourself falling back into old ways, stop and re-center before continuing forward. In this way, you’ll be able to find a relationship that completely works for you and makes you happy

THERAPY SERVICES FOR DATING AND RELATIONSHIPS WE OFFER IN MANHATTAN & BROOKLYN, NEW YORK

If the journey of being a happy, single person feels challenging, seeking professional support can be a valuable resource. Therapists are trained to help individuals navigate their emotions, explore personal goals, and develop strategies for finding fulfillment. Through therapy, you can gain insights into patterns of thinking and behavior, identify areas for growth and receive guidance on building a positive and meaningful life.

Our society often prioritizes romantic relationships, but learning how to be happy as a single person is a powerful and transformative journey. It’s a time for self-reflection, personal growth and the cultivation of genuine happiness that comes from within. By embracing solitude, practicing self-love, building meaningful connections and setting personal goals, you can navigate the single life with confidence. Remember that being single is not a state of lack but an opportunity for fulfillment. Embrace your journey, focus on your well-being and fall in love with yourself!

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2. Learn More About Our Team of Female Therapists and Our Areas of Expertise
3. Let’s Talk About How We Can Help You Feel Empowered & Ready To Take The Next Step. 

OTHER THERAPY SERVICES OFFERED IN MANHATTAN, BROOKLYN, & THROUGHOUT NEW YORK

We offer a diverse range of individual counseling services and couples therapy. Our dedicated therapists can help with stress management, symptoms of depression, self-esteem challenges, and college student counseling. Additionally, we specialize in offering support for addressing body image concerns, and navigating the unique challenges faced by women, among other aspects. If you need support, reach out to connect with a therapist.