Self-Love Affirmations: How to Use Words to Build a Loving Relationship with Yourself

What is self love?

Self-love can look different for everyone. What it means to one person, may be a slight adaptation to someone elses definition of it. What someone perceives as self-love also can depend on what situation or environment they are in. Self-love is when we uphold concepts like self-respect, self-value, self-esteem and self-worth. But ultimately, self-love revolves most around self-compassion: It’s the intentional choice to show up for yourself, support your goals and desires, and honor your limitations.

An article by the Cleveland Clinic stated: “there’s a real shift in psychology toward self-compassion and really being able to look at loving yourself and treating yourself the way you would your own best friend, and being able to really show up for yourself when you’re struggling or when things are not going your way.” 

What are positive affirmations:

Positive affirmations are words or phrases that you say to yourself. They are often used as a way to counter negative thoughts. We want to try and replace critical and negative self-talk with positive and uplifting statements. By reciting positive affirmations, you can shift your mindset towards a more optimistic perspective, consciously  and subconsciously. 

Self-love affirmations are a form of positive affirmations. Negative self-talk can take a significant toll on one’s mental health, and it’s essential to rewire thought patterns to build a positive relationship with ourselves. Practicing positive affirmations can be paramount in challenging self-limiting beliefs and boosting self-esteem.

What is Self-Compassion?

Self-compassion is a concept rooted in mindfulness and self-care that involves treating oneself with the same kindness, care, and understanding that one would offer to a close friend in times of suffering or difficulty. Self-compassion consists of three key components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness.  Self-compassion and self-love are tools that are paramount for combatting a vast variety of mental health struggles. While the terms may seem rudimentary to some, many struggle with developing these tools within themselves. Self-compassion can help heal feelings of anxiety, depression, body image, self esteem issues, to name a few. When often asked, “Well, what would you tell a friend? Would you speak to them the same way you speak to yourself?, the answer tends to be definitely not! The idea is to extend the same kindness and care to oneself as you do others. Being self compassionate can look like:

1. Practice Mindfulness: Taking stock of emotions and allowing yourself to live in the moment and be present 
2. Talk kindly to yourself especially when experiencing challenging times: Give yourself grace
3. Understand your imperfections and flaws and validate it is part of the human experience 

20 Examples of Self-Love Affirmations 

1. I am enough exactly as I am.
2. I am a human being.
3. I am not perfect, and that is a wonderful thing.
4. My fears do not control me.
5. I am not defined by my family.
6. I am not defined by my past.
7. My past does not determine my future.
8. My dreams are achievable.
9. I am proud of who I am.
10. I am proud of what I have overcome.
11. I love that I am uniquely me.
12. I am strong and capable. 
13. I am doing the best I can.
14. I embrace all of my feelings.
15. My looks do not define who I am.
16. The only approval I need is my own.
17. I am open to receiving love from myself and others.
18. I will accept the compliments I receive.
19. My love for myself is always there, no matter what.
20. I am not defined by my fears.

Why is this important?

It’s difficult to show up for others without first engaging in a degree of self-love. As we often hear, you can’t love anyone else if you don’t love yourself. People often neglect self-care due to busy schedules, viewing it as a luxury rather than a necessity.  However, research shows that self-compassion significantly benefits physical and mental health. Self-compassion is linked to better physical health and higher self-compassion correlates with lower psychological distress and better overall mental well-being- particularly when paired with compassion for others. Good mental health can reduce stress hormones and lower the risk of various illnesses, including depression, heart disease, and even cancer. In the long run, practicing self-love and self-compassion can meaningfully improve the quality of our lives. 

Self-compassion is something you can learn and may take practice, so don’t worry if it doesn’t come naturally or if it feels awkward! 

• Allow yourself to feel your feelings
• Do self-assessments and check in with your mental state
• Be kind to yourself- easier said than done!
• Support yourself before triggering events
• Take care of yourself before you start your days and also at the end of the day
• Hold others accountable and identify one-sided relationships
• Set boundaries!!!
• Notice what and who fulfills you and what/who does not serve you
• Engage in mindfulness, exercise, and journaling- it can even be for as short as 1 minute
• Head over to therapy! Therapeutic modalities such as CBT and DBT are instrumental to emboldening your postiive self-beliefs and reducing negative self-talk

Last but not least!

Never forget, our relationship with ourselves is the longest one we have! So the next time you find yourself engaging in negative self talk, being too hard on yourself, or speaking to yourself in a way you never would to a friend or family mamber, take note of it and try and restructure those thoughts and beliefs to ones that allow yourself grace and compassion, acknowledging that you are human and that is a beautiful thing. 

Let’s finish this off with a self-love affirmation:

I am enough exactly as I am. I honor my journey, trust my growth, and love myself unconditionally. 

FIGURE OUT WHAT SUCCESS LOOKS LIKE FOR YOU WITH THERAPY FOR WOMEN IN MANHATTAN & BROOKLYN

The truth is, there’s no single or one-size-fits-all definition of success. Everyone has a different idea of what they want their life to look like. That is why it’s important to get clear on what that looks like for you. Once you have a better understanding of yourself and your values, you can start designing your life based on the things that are most important to you. 

Therapy for women in Manhattan and Brooklyn is a great way to figure out what success looks like for you. At Manhattan Wellness, we will provide you with a safe space to explore your feelings and goals. So you can find clarity on what you want for yourself. We will pair your vulnerability with our empathy and encouragement. Then together we will uncover the key elements that will take you from where you are now to where you want to be. If you are ready to make the changes you want in your life:

1. Submit a Contact Form or Email Us at hello@manhattanwellness.org
2. Learn More About Our Team of Female Therapists and Our Areas of Expertise
3. Let’s Talk About How We Can Help You Feel Empowered & Ready To Take The Next Step. 

We believe that you have the power within yourself to make the changes you want and find your version of success. Our female therapists are here to support you in navigating this journey. Allowing you to reclaim your identity and take control of your life. Thus allowing you to create the future you’ve been dreaming of.

OTHER THERAPY SERVICES AT MANHATTAN WELLNESS IN MANHATTAN, WESTCHESTER, BROOKLYN & THROUGHOUT NEW YORK

At Manhattan Wellness, our therapists are here to support you in navigating this journey and reclaiming your identity. So you can take control of your life and create the future you’ve been dreaming of. This is why we offer a variety of services to ensure you get the support, care, and guidance necessary. The therapy services we offer are Therapy for Maternal Mental Health, Self-Esteem Counseling, and Anxiety Treatment. Along with Dating/Relationship Counseling, Counseling for College Students, and more. Feel as if you are not living the life you deserve? Let’s talk about it.