Life can sometimes feel like stepping into a time machine. One minute, your college friend group is sharing TikTok memes and making happy hour plans—and the next, the group chat is filled with engagement announcements and newborn photos. Friends are sending listings for their first homes and debating the best OBs, and you’re left wondering: how did this all happen so fast?
You might catch yourself thinking, Am I the only single friend left? Those thoughts can quietly turn into self-doubt, questions about your worth, or a sense of anxiety about where you “should” be in life. If that’s you, I want you to know this: it’s okay. You’re not alone—and you’re not behind. Let’s explore why.
Relationships don’t all have the same equation
Let’s think of all the relationships you know. Some met on hinge, some set up on a blind date, or maybe some are dating after years of knowing each other. Couples can get married at 25 and have kids at 27, while others not till much later. There is no “right” equation or timeline when it comes to dating. Everyone is different, everyone is on their own life journey. This doesn’t mean you are “late” to life– it’s simply your own path, unique to you.
Stop comparing yourself to others
It’s common to question your own self when everyone around you seems happy and in love. Let’s challenge those negative thoughts. Don’t consume yourself with the baby pictures and engagement photo shoots you see online. Most of the time people are just putting on a show for social media to portray themselves in a certain light. You aren’t seeing the arguments or private conversations in an instagram post.
Soak up the “singleness” while you can
When the time is right, your person will come along. But for the time being, enjoy the independence! Treat yourself to some self-care or try something new. Reach out to that friend you have been pushing off coffee with for the past few weeks. Get lost in a book series. The time will come when you coexist with another, so enjoy the time for YOU.
Remember you aren’t “waiting”
Stop telling yourself “this is a waiting game.” When you think about it, the world is still spinning, things are still moving forward. You are living your life, being yourself, going about your routines. Getting a new job, taking a walk outside, calling your mom on the phone are all occurring at this moment. Enjoy it, be present, don’t rush it. Instead of looking at it as waiting for your journey to begin, remind yourself you have already gotten to this point. Be proud of that.
Your time will come too- Trust me
Each day that passes, you are learning more about yourself and exploring what you want out of a relationship. Everyday that passes is another day to show up as you, gain emotional maturity, and learn independence before dependence. The right person will come around before you know it. Use this valuable time to learn more about yourself.
Let’s not sugarcoat it: dating in NYC is tough. Being the last single friend can make room for negative thoughts, self-deprecating beliefs, and anxiety-driven actions. Next time you feel these thoughts creeping in, know that you are not alone. Engage in self-care, be kind to yourself and know that we are here for you.
FEEL MORE CONFIDENT WITH THERAPY FOR WOMEN IN BROOKLYN & MANHATTAN, NEW YORK
At Manhattan Wellness, we understand that with all the messages we receive from the world, it can be difficult to maintain a positive narrative about ourselves. From social media, movies, and even people close to us, it can be hard to drown out the negative. So much so that our inner critic takes over and we forget to show ourselves the same compassion as others. That’s why our female therapists want to support you in building the confidence you need to reach your highest potential. Let us help you create an empowering narrative that will benefit all aspects of your life, from personal to professional. If you are interested in beginning counseling for women:
- Submit a Contact Form or Email Us at hello@manhattanwellness.org
- Learn More About Our Team and Our Areas of Expertise
- Begin Seeing Yourself in a Whole New Light!
OTHER THERAPY SERVICES AT MANHATTAN WELLNESS IN MANHATTAN, WESTCHESTER, BROOKLYN & THROUGHOUT NEW YORK
Our therapists understand that building confidence takes time and that other issues can come up along the way. To better support you, we offer a variety of services to cater to your individual needs. The therapy services we offer are Therapy for Self Esteem, Anxiety Treatment, and therapy for dating and relationship issues. As well as therapy for college students, support for maternal mental health, body image therapy, and so much more. Are you feel like you’re not living the life you want and need to make changes? Let’s talk about it.
