Relationships are always evolving. As much as we wish our relationships were all perfect and conflict-free, that’s just not reality. There may be periods when you feel disconnected from your partner, whether that be romantic or platonic. This can happen for many reasons, and a lot of them might not even have to do with you. If you’re feeling disconnected in your relationship, here are seven tips to help you reconnect.
7 Tips From A Manhattan Couples Therapist on How to Reconnect
Express your needs to reconnect.
If you are feeling disconnected, it may be because they aren’t listening to what you need, or something is making you feel frustrated with them. It can be helpful to tell them how this makes you feel and then ask for more of that behavior in the future (ex: “It would help me feel more connected if you would ask how my day was.”).
Create a shared activity.
If they are distracted, try to find something that will make them smile and bring their focus back to the present moment with you. Bring out your favorite board game or watch a movie together — whatever helps remind both of you why it is great to be together!
Practice empathy.
If they are feeling disconnected, try to understand why that is by asking questions like “What’s going on? What can I do to help you?” Sometimes there isn’t a straightforward answer. The best thing you can do is be there for them and let them know that you’re there to listen if they need it.
Make physical connection a priority.
Hold their hand while walking down the street or cuddle up with them when watching TV. Physical connection can really help boost a sense of connectedness and wellbeing.
Compliment them.
Acknowledge all the good they bring into your life and tell them how much you appreciate them. This will help remind them why they are important to you.
Be patient.
Remember that connection ebbs and flows. No relationship is perfect all the time. If you are feeling disconnected, it can be helpful to remind yourself of this. And the reverse is true as well. When things are going great and you’re feeling very close and intimate with your partner, don’t take them for granted. Relationships require real, sustained effort and dedication.
Take some time for yourself to help you reconnect.
This one might come as a surprise, but it will help you reconnect with yourself and figure out what it is that you need. Reconnecting with yourself can also help you be a better listener and supporter to your partner.
Final Thoughts From A Manhattan Couples Therapist
These are just a few tips to help you reconnect when you feel disconnected in your relationship. It is normal for there to be times of connection and then disconnection — don’t let it put a damper on your relationship! With some effort, you can work through these periods and come out stronger than ever. Want to learn 4 more ways to reconnect with your partner?
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